![]() He knows how to hurt me: by mistreating our kids.Īll this is to say, it sounds like Fritzel was this kind of man, but with physical abuse mixed in during a time when it was acceptable to "discipline" one's wife and children. And even though we've been apart 4 years, I STILL dread enforcing boundaries and inciting his wrath. It actually took me quite some time AFTER our separation to realize how abusive the situation was. ![]() He never beat me, so there was never any kind of evidence. I felt it was my responsibility to shield our kids from the worst parts of him. I know that with my ex husband, a large part of my time at home revolved around keeping him from getting angry at me or the kids. People like this are very good at "training" those they live with to behave in certain ways, to cater to their needs, to try to anticipate what they will want before they realize it themselves, all in the hope of keeping them placated. Before long, you try to avoid bringing up ANY topic, for fear that the seemingly innocuous topic will be one that sets him off. You don't call them out on stuff because you don't want to risk them getting angry. If you've ever lived with someone who uses his anger to intimidate and threaten, you learn to adjust everything in your day to try to avoid angering that person. I think it comes down to living with Anger. I think about this a lot with wives of serial killers or serial abusers like this. Related Subs and Links: The Crime Newsroom Discord /r/UnresolvedMysteries /r/RedditCrimeCommunity /r/ColdCases Directory of Crime Subreddits Crime Custom Feed
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